Oh nooooo!
Music: Menthol - Codes and Ciphers
Mood: Groggy

Man, I'm pissed. Last night was Menthol's concert at Schuba's and I forgot. Godammit. I *really* wanted to go see them, because I'm finally old enough to get into a bar and see and hear them play live. Hopefully they'll have some more shows this summer around Chicago, because I'm dying to check them out. They've got a show coming up in Champaign, but I don't think I'm going to head out for that. Bah.

So I've decided to drop Script Analysis. It's way too annoying, too tedious and I'm way too far behind. Moreover, it's a fucking elective that I don't need for my major. And even if I drop the class I'll still have enough credits to remain full time.

I need a job this summer. Being penniless sucks so much. There's nothing less masculine than having to ask your girlfriend to pay for a meal or for a movie. I hate that. I know she feels like she should share some of burden of dating, but I guess I grew up with a very traditional view of it. Open doors. Pull out chairs. Pay for dates.

Anyway, gotta catch a train in a few hours to Geneva to see Sarah (and co?).
- posted by Brendan @ 1:51 PM 0 comments

 
Never meant 2
Music: Menthol - A Bitter Feud
Mood: Tired as fuck all.. yet content.

So then, as per my usual drama - things have kind of sorted themsevlves out. Sarah saw my previous entry this morning, and seemed to think it was alluding to a complete break up. Which really was never my intention. I would never say "I want to take a break" if I meant, "I want to break up". I just wish she'd believe me when I say these things. I know she's afraid that I'm going to get bored and feel trapped. And she's insecure about those things. But the fact is is that that insecurity that I feel is really coming between us. The fear of me leaving is what's going to make me leave.

But enough of that. Things are okay now, and that's what counts.

I saw a fantastic documentary today in class. It's called Hearts and Minds. Made in 1974, it chronicles the history of the Vietnam War from its inception to its ultimate conclusion - and the change in public opinion, and political opinion, of the war. With some pretty powerful interviews with soldiers who were there. They begin as naive wide eyed soldiers, and come out as battle worn, physically and emotionally injured, victims of a needless war. Much of the footage is on location, with them talking to both Americans as well as North and South Vietnamese. It's quite an eye opener, and considering the, um, situation in this day. The remark one of the veterans make that 'Americans, and the American government, don't want to remember what happened here.' couldn't be more relavent.

The parallels couldn't be more obvious.



See it if you can. I'll be buying it as soon as possible.
- posted by Brendan @ 4:31 PM 0 comments

 
Killing me softely
Music: None
Mood: Betrayed

Funny. I was going to write a lengthy post, with pics and video, about how the weekend went. How much fun it was, being with Other Pat, Talitha, Collin, Chris, Stefin.. and Sarah. About how wonderful her surprise party went, how great it was.

Instead I'm "taking a break".

I don't want to think about those things, or her.

It'd hurt too much.
- posted by Brendan @ 9:59 PM 0 comments